I found out this week that a good friend had been molested by a priest when he was in JR high...it made me so sad & furious all at the same time. Sad for my friend - furious at the priest. This is the 2nd friend I've had that this happened to. The priest is a huge person of power and authority when you are a child. You feel that you need to obey him without question. The catholic church tells you that a priest is a confidant - so that if you need help go to them. So - they have power, control, trust - everything they need to quietly do whatever the hell they want.
People say "why didn't the kid just tell his parents?". Looking back on the way we were brought up in the catholic church/school makes me realize why these kids don't do that. We are taught that priests are 'next to god' and can do no wrong. We also trust and love our parents - so this causes a huge dilemma...it is a huge decision to make - to go against the person who is "next to god".
My childhood friend (I'll call him Sam) was molested in high school. We went to catholic high school together. He was a blast to hang out with. We skipped a lot of school to do silly things. He was much more sophisticated than me and taught me lots of things. He made me try escargot (much better than it sounds), how to act in fancy restaurants & what forks were for what, try on clothes that I never thought I would... Other kids at school asked me if he was gay - my answer "I don't know and I don't care." After high school I moved away and got married. He came to visit and brought a friend. I didn't think anything about it. The 2nd morning he came to me in tears and said he had something to tell me...Andy was more than just a friend. My reaction was a smile and "ok". I think he expected me to get upset/grossed out/tell him to go away. I did none of those - it really was ok with me. I just wanted him to be happy. After that he 'spilled his guts'. When we were in high school Sam and his dad did Not get along. His dad was ex-military and Sam was not tough/rough/into sports - in other words the things that a military dad probably wanted in his only son. So Sam turned to a young priest (Fr. Jake) for help. That priest befriended him - and then took advantage of him.
Here's where the church comes in and 100% FAILS! They got wind of his 'relationships' with boys' so they moved him to another church in another town...One with a grade school attached!!! ARGHHHHHHHHHHH
I happened to catch part of a day time talk show and they were talking about priests molesting kids - I promptly called the parish (which was in my area) and told them to have Fr. Jake watch it. I heard on the news a month or so later that he was under investigation. He left soon after that. Somehow I heard that he had moved back to the city where I went to high school. I tracked him down. He was now a pastor/minister at the different denomination of church. I wrote them a letter telling them what he was like. He disappeared from there w/in a few months and then I lost track of him. (Maybe I will spend some time today seeing if I can track him down again)! He should be in jail - not hopping from church to church where he can hurt more boys.
